“Using” Your Connections
Over the years, I have built up a pretty good list of professional and artistic contacts. In terms of professional contacts, I have really good relationships with current and former coworkers – executive directors, managers, developers, and the “average grunt” who works down in the trenches with the rest of us. These are the people that I’m connected to via LinkedIn. In terms of artistic contacts, I am friends with a professional writer who is a national bestseller and musicians who have played with extremely well-known acts. In a couple of cases, I’m 1-2 steps away from meeting some legendary musical acts that most people would kill to meet; the same goes for other national bestselling authors. When I have talked with friends about things I’ve worked on for my artistic friends, many have asked me why don’t I “use them” to get my foot in the door to meet people who could change my life? The answer is quite simple: I don’t like using people.
While I have asked former professional contacts for references, that’s as far as I go when “using my network.” When it comes to my artistic contacts, I never ask anything of them. Using people to get ahead is something I don’t do and have a natural distaste towards. I’m sure my artistic friends are constantly bombarded with people trying to ask favors of them, and I go out of my way not to abuse my relationships with them or give off any kind of vibe that I want something from them. Sure, if I asked, I could get a huge leg up with some of their contacts. I have done some things to help them throughout their careers, and I could ask them to return the favor. However, I’m a person who believes in going out and getting it by myself. I don’t wait for a handout or remind people what I’ve done for them so they’ll return the favor. I’m a Virgo; I enjoy doing for others far more than I enjoy doing for myself. I know, I know. Some people may think I’m nuts, but I really do receive personal satisfaction out of helping others over myself, especially other artists. Plus, having the attitude that I have about helping others over myself has helped me anyway. The things I do for others have a way of paying off in the long term, which it has in several cases.
If you’ve been following my Twitter feed, then you’re aware that I’m really dissatisfied with my current job…so much so that I’m not sure if I want to continue working in IT. Usually, I would turn to my professional contacts when I get ready to search for a new gig. This time, it might be different. I’m sick of the cube life – really sick of it. If I had to, I could tolerate it a bit longer; it’s not completely horrible. I just feel that I’ve gotten to a point where I’m tired of suppressing the artist side of me in my professional life. I’d rather have a workday doing something artistic and creative than doing the IT work that I’m doing right now. Since I’m at a point where I’m ready to make a different career change, I know that turning to my artistic friends would be an obvious answer; however, the “get it on your own merit” side of me is alive and well. For me, I don’t like doing things through the easiest route possible. Why? Because it’s much more sweeter if you take the longer, more challenging road of earning what’s coming to you.
Therefore, I’m not going to pick up the phone or email my artistic friends to ask them for a professional favor. I’m going to hunker down, come up with a plan, and figure out how to get into something new, something creative…something that allows me to be the artist that I am.
P.S.
And no, I’m not full of sh*t with this post. I genuinely believe in earning what I want with my own blood, sweat, and tears.